Wednesday 7 January 2015

Meditation and The Dentist

Dear Readers;

I've been meditating and chanting the Maha Mantra ...Hare Krsna Hare Krsna Krsna Krsna Hare Hare, Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare....  for the past forty years but would I be able to mentally chant when I was sitting on the dentists chair..... feeling terrified?
Photo from Pintrest.

I broke my back upper molar to bits a little while back. I knew that I had to visit the dentist but I stalled...... forever!   I knew that the tooth would probably have to come out.....I just knew it.

My regular dentist wasn't available so a newer man/boy dentist took her place. I said that I thought  the tooth was a goner.... RIP... molar . He said that it was better to try and repair ... then if that didn't work out  he would pull it.

Long story short....it didn't work and he couldn't pull it out.

He immediately sent me to the surgeon. While I was waiting I saw the  x rays of my teeth. The roots of the molar were a little bit bent around my wisdom tooth.

I heard the surgeon talking with his assistant and they said that they would have to remove two teeth! I quickly chimed in," No..no just one is good." He said ..."Your dentist said another would have to be removed to extract the broken one." Me..."No that would be a misprint....he said that he would repair the other one so you just need to pull the seriously broken one."

He did not make the call to confirm what I said...thankfully. Hairdressers can get scissor happy and dental surgeons may get a little ...."Pull them little suckers out happy."

I received another three shots of Novacaine....putting me up to seven in the past few hours.( My husband told me..."It's cocaine...call it what they like...it's still cocaine."

They left me alone until the freezing could take effect.

My thought pattern was...OH MY GOD!!!.....I'M GOING TO END UP LIKE THAT GUY......HALF MY FACE PARALYZED.....THIS IS MY MONEY MAKER! I MAY NOT BE BEAUTIFUL OR EVEN PHOTOGENIC BUT IT'S ALL I'VE GOT.....AHHHHHHH!!!! I CAN'T JUST RUN AWAY BECAUSE I CAN'T EAT. .......I KNOW I HAVE TO DO THIS.....IT'S GOING TO HURT.....I'VE NEVER HAD A TOOTH PULLED....IT'S GOING TO HURT...WHY GOD WHY? WHY ME???? WAHHHHHH!
Photo from Pintrest.

On the outside.....I just appeared like a very relaxed, mature, pleasant women.

....now...I'm thinking..."Pull yourself together! Have you not been chanting and meditating and trying to control your senses...like ...FOREVER?....errrr...yes?.....ok then....what did you do when the airplane went nuts?......I went into a deep meditation.......right....do that now!"

I took one deep belly breath...held it...let it out slowly. I did this three times....then I chanted and meditated on  Krsna and told him how scared I was feeling. Then I "saw" in my mind the roots of my tooth straightening out.

The surgeon and his assistant returned to find a peaceful,  slightly lopsided smiling women. He took his pliers and crack...crack...yank....ha!...it's out!

I realized that ...why yes, you can meditate anywhere...at the dentists or the surgeons and it can take just minutes...even seconds to dive deeply into a very happy place.

Until next time.
Hare Krsna,
Lal




Monday 5 January 2015

Clothing or Fashion?

Dear Readers;

I have often  posed the question to myself, "As a spiritualist...are clothes important to me?"

Yes!!! That would be a resounding yes!

Every morning when I get up I have to decide what to wear according to the weather...according to my daily activities.

Now that I am older I've decided to forget about fashion and wear what ever suits my mood and small requirements.

 I like to see but not be seen.

 I don't like to be the center of attention....I find that embarrassing.

 I love black.

I found that this Japanese designer, Yohji Yamamoto, to be pretty cool. I like his style...simple.

He says things like..."Let me talk like an old man. Young people, be careful. Beautiful things are disappearing every day. Be careful.…You don’t need to be [shopping at fast-fashion stores], especially young people. They are beautiful naturally, because they are young. So they should even wear simple jeans and a T-shirt. It’s enough. Don’t be too much fashionable.…The brand advertising is making you crazy. You don’t need to be too sexy. You are sexy enough." yohji yamamoto.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_ovpSDZRAlw

I won't purchase his clothing because I buy most of what I need at the local thrift stores but I am inspired by his view point.

Until next time,
Hare Krsna,
Lal

Friday 2 January 2015

Bent Not Broken In 2015

Dear Readers;

Happy New Year 2015!! May all your wishes both material and spiritual come true.

Wowee! Can you believe just how quickly 2014 came and poof!....it's gone?

 I almost feel as though I've reached the summit of a hill and now I'm rolling down faster and faster. My only consolation is that we are all in this together! Sometimes I think....I can't believe that I'm 56 years old! I've been living in this body for 56 Winters....56 Summers....56 Sping times...and my all time favorite time of year 56 Autumns!!! Perhaps I like the Autumn season the best because I am in the Autumn season of my life.

I'm not thrilled with the aging process...the skin getting a little loose...especially under the chin and underarms. Yet...forget the body for a moment and I feel for the first time in my life that I like myself. This past year I've made so much peace with myself. I used to think that I was weird because I didn't want to be surrounded by stuff. As a creative person I felt that I should want to be surrounded by colour...by odd things...by people.....I should want to travel to find inspiration....that I should be happy all of the time...that I should let go of my past....

The French have a saying,"Tu a le droit!" ....You have the right!

This year I've given myself the right to acknowledge  that I had a shitty childhood. That having being ripped away from my family and culture as a four year old and placed into an physically and sexually abusive home was devastating.

Running away from the pain is exhausting!

Now I say, " I had the right to feel the terrible pain of loneliness,betrayal and gut wrenching fear!"

....but......now....I'm OK.........I survived......dented perhaps....bent but not broken......

I'm wabi-sabi......imperfect....impermanent and unfinished....

I'm looking forward to a great year of discovering new realizations, new friends and new adventures.

I hope that you also can find a little more peace and happiness in this New Year of 2015.

Until next time,
Hare Krsna,
Lal